My First Date in 5 Months

As my regular readers know, despite my stunning beauty and exceptional charm, I can never seem to get a date. And when I do go on a date, they never turn into second dates (see the entry on my previous date).

My friend’s boyfriend Joe, (mentioned already here) decided to set me up with one of his friends. Most of my single friends hate being set up. I love it. I love finding out what my friends think is the perfect man for me and I love going on dates period (so I have ammo for my blog of course). I trust this guy, I think he’s pretty stand-up in the way he treats my friend and the pics he was showing me of his friend were pretty good so I figured why not.

It was going to be a double date, which I’ve never really been on for the first date, and was pretty nervous about a close friend seeing the way I am on a first date. But, I figured, at least I’d have a witness to the things men say to me on dates. So I met the other couple in front of the little Mexican place we were eating at. Us two girls went in and sat down while Joe waited outside for my date. When my date walked in, I was pleasantly surprised. He was pretty good looking- with a nice white smile and big teeth (I think I’ve mentioned before how much I like that). He sat down, introductions were made, etc.

Then he started talking. The dude was TANKED. Now, I’ve been nervous before dates before, and have downed a shot or two of vodka before meeting someone, but this guy was plastered. Apparently he’d been on a booze cruise during the day for his buddy’s birthday, a story which he told about 46 times. Literally. That is not an exaggeration. Of course, the story of the afternoon boozing came after he told us all about how a good friend of his wanted to get into the porn industry and was constantly seeking his advice (uhm- what exactly makes him so knowledgeable on the industry?).

Thank god there were others there. I don’t  know what I would have done if I were alone. He was drunk. DRUNK! He knew about the date 2 weeks in advance…Men, if you are going to meet a lady for the first time, please don’t get drunk first.

So the bill comes. Now, you all know my history with men paying on the first date. I was pretty sure this guy wouldn’t, just because they never do. Unfortunately, he didn’t surprise me by paying. Instead, he let Joe pay. Like he hadn’t embarrassed Joe enough. But I guess if he’s about to become unemployed, then what can we expect? (He told us he was about to lose his job. Great thing to say on a first date. All the ladies are impressed by an unemployed man).

I’m going to bed tonite telling myself that Joe thinks SO highly of me that when describing me to Drunk Man he scared him into drinking his face off to calm his nerves before meeting me.